How I Finally Broke the Cycle of Betrayal
Have you ever said yes when your whole body whispered no?
Maybe it was a favor you didn’t have energy for.
A dinner you showed up to when what you really needed was quiet.
Or someone asked how you were… and you smiled and said, “I’m fine.”
You weren’t falling apart. But you weren’t okay either.
You felt a little off—and ignored it.
We all do.
What we don’t realize is that these are the moments where self-trust is built… or broken.
Not because something big happened.
But because something small didn’t.
💡 What Are Micro Truths?
In Conscious Loving, Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks describe microscopic truths—the tiny internal signals we often override.
- A clench in your chest before you say yes
- A wave of resistance before you agree to something
- A craving for space, for help, for a break
- A flicker of truth you silence before it’s fully formed
These are your micro truths.
They’re not loud. They’re not dramatic.
But they’re yours. And if you want to build self-trust—the kind that makes you unshakeable—you have to start here.
🚘 The Moment It Hit Me
I remember the exact moment I came across this concept.
I was on a long drive, listening to the audiobook version of Conscious Loving. I was going through a season of deep betrayal, and I still remember how it felt—like a portal opened and spoke directly to me.
Honesty was a big part of my identity.
I didn’t cheat. I didn’t lie.
That was my shield: You may betray, but I don’t. I’m better than that.
But hearing about micro truths cracked something open.
Because while I prided myself on being outwardly honest, I realized I was deeply dishonest in subtle ways.
Every time I people-pleased.
Every time I said what was expected.
Every time I said yes out of guilt or fear.
I was lying.
And the worst part? I knew.
I felt it in my body—but I did it anyway.
At first, I didn’t have the courage to override people’s disappointment.
So I started small.
I would whisper the truth to myself, even if I still said the “right” thing out loud.
And then one day, I remembered something my husband’s mentor, Dr. Nawabi—a brilliant oncologist and deeply spiritual man—once told me:
“Your job is to tell your truth. What happens after that is not your business. The Divine is the Truth, and the Truth always wins.”
I clung to that.
I’d actually say it out loud—sometimes multiple times—before I could gather the strength to be honest.
It became my lifeline.
And that truth trail… brought me home to myself.
🪞 A Quick Self-Check (Pause + Reflect)
Before we go further, take 10 seconds:
📍 Think of a recent moment where something felt off—but you overrode it anyway.
Maybe it was saying yes.
Maybe it was pretending to be okay.
Maybe it was staying quiet instead of asking for what you needed.
What was your micro truth in that moment?
Just name it to yourself.
That moment right there?
That’s the place where transformation begins.
🛠️ The Micro Truth Ritual (How to Build Self-Trust)
You don’t have to flip your life upside down to create change.
You just need to get in the habit of telling the truth—to yourself.
Start here:
🧘 1. Pause + Scan Your Body
What are you feeling right now?
Tension? Numbness? Resistance? Relief?
Don’t analyze. Just observe.
💬 2. Name the Truth (Even Privately)
You don’t have to act on it.
Just say:
- “I’m doing this to please.”
- “I feel tight and I’m saying yes anyway.”
- “I’m not okay with this, even if I’m pretending I am.”
This is how you re-establish trust with yourself.
🔁 3. Let the Truth Shape One Small Choice
Don’t rush to change everything.
But maybe you:
- Say “Let me think about it” instead of “yes”
- Ask for a pause in the conversation
- Let yourself rest without explaining why
Small truth → Small shift → Massive trust
Over time, these micro moments rewire your nervous system and rebuild your internal relationship.
✨ Why This One Habit Changes Everything
So many people ask me:
“How do I stop second-guessing myself?”
“How do I rebuild confidence after betrayal or burnout?”
“How do I know what’s real for me?”
The answer isn’t always therapy. Or a retreat. Or a strategy.
It’s a daily ritual of micro honesty.
Self-trust is not a trait.
It’s not something you’re born with.
It’s a habit.
A muscle you build, one flicker of truth at a time.
When you stop skipping over what’s real…
You stop outsourcing your peace.
You stop over-explaining your needs.
You stop performing in relationships just to belong.
Instead, you return home to yourself.
And that’s where transformation truly begins.
💬 One Loving Invitation
Today—just once—before you say yes, respond, justify, or explain…
Pause.
Tune in.
And ask:
👉 “Is this true for me?”
Even if you don’t act on it—feel it.
That alone is healing.
Because every time you acknowledge your inner truth…
you’re telling yourself:
“I trust you. I’ve got you. I’m listening now.”
And from that place?
You become the most powerful person in the room.
Enjoying a beautiful spring day, having spiritual conversations with my friends that I read the Book of Miracles with. Great food, even better company: Life’s beautiful moments