How I Finally Broke the Cycle of Betrayal
I kept asking myself:
Why does betrayal keep finding me?
No matter how much work I did—therapy, reflection, learning to communicate better—this same pain point kept showing up like clockwork.
It didn’t matter how much I tried to be better, love harder, give more, or understand deeper.
Somewhere deep down, I knew: this wasn’t just about the people in front of me.
It was a curriculum.
A spiritual, psychological, emotional curriculum in Earth School that I had to complete before it exhausted me.
And I was bullish about completing it.
I was determined to finally understand why this was happening, and how to stop reliving the same hollow, gut-punching pain.
I wanted my peace back.
And then—right in the middle of that raw, determined season—I came across a concept in Conscious Loving by Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks that stopped me cold:
Microtruths.
Tiny, honest truths we tell ourselves.
Not dramatic confessions.
Just clear, quiet, undistorted moments of truth.
It might sound small.
It’s not.
Because when you’re stuck in a pain cycle—when you want to break free but can’t—the one thing you can’t afford to do anymore is keep telling even the smallest lies to yourself.
And that’s exactly what I had been doing.
Over and over again.
Quietly. Subtly. Unknowingly.
Practicing microtruths in the micromoments of my life—pausing to have real talks with myself—became the gamechanger.
It gave me the one thing I’d been desperate for:
A relationship of trust and camaraderie with myself.
The kind of trust that finally allowed me to feel peace of heart, clarity of mind, and moments of joy—without conditions.
Without needing anyone or anything outside me to change first.
The moment I required myself to start telling the truth—not just to others, but to me—everything shifted.
I became confident… because I became clear.
I took full responsibility for self-honesty.
I understood:
    I can’t expect anyone else to change if I’m not willing to change myself.
It started small:
    “I’m not okay with this, and I haven’t been for a long time.”
“That conversation left a pit in my stomach.”
“I don’t trust this, even though I want to.”
“I actually don’t want to go. And that’s okay.”
Every time I told a microtruth instead of a micro-lie, I felt something shift:
My breath deepened.
My body unclenched.
My self-respect returned.
And my clarity brought back my confidence.
Something else happened too—others began trusting me more.
Because I was now speaking from a wise, honest place inside me.
And I stopped being okay with accepting lies or betrayals from others.
Instead of stuffing myself with more justifications, I started crowding out the self-betrayal until all that remained was deep, clear, sometimes brazen honesty.
And it wasn’t scary. It was liberating.
Somehow, the more honest I became, the more self-acceptance I felt.
The more honesty I practiced, the more safety and trust I had with myself.
It was like a buy-one-get-many-free deal—and I wanted all of it.
Because for so long, I had been obsessed with what others wanted, needed, required, or demanded of me.
And the only way to meet all of it… was to lie to myself.
To shut myself out.
To put myself aside.
To betray my own Knowing.
And I was done with that.
For years, I looked like love on the outside—
while quietly unraveling on the inside.
And honestly?
My self-trust and inner integrity skyrocketed
the moment I stopped betraying myself.
💞 Ready to Feel Whole—Not at War with Yourself?
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